Can't (and certainly didn't) please everybody

The weekend in Norman was fun, but it didn't quite go as planned. I kind of saw all that coming when K told me on Wednesday that three of his guys were coming with us. I knew two of them, so I didn't mind, but that meant everything about the trip would change -- we'd no longer be staying for free at a friend's house, but we'd have to find somewhere where we could all stay. We might have to worry about finding tickets for other people, which would be next to impossible, since the OU-M!am! game has been sold out for weeks.

I spent Wednesday night calling literally every hotel in Norman. I finally found a vacancy at the Super 8. We'd all stay in a suite. Perfect.

ER, though, had planned on the OU-M!am! weekend being a big us weekend. Originally, it was supposed to be a bachelor/bachelorette weekend. We'd go out separately -- the guys, and the girls -- on Friday night, and then we'd all go to the game on Saturday, then party together Saturday night. It slowly started changing, though.

We were all supposed to stay with ER's sister and her husband at their house in Norman. And since ER's brother-in-law isn't "a big bar guy," the guys would stay at home and play Nintendo Wii. Now K loves the Wii, but he has one of his own. He doesn't want to drive 8 hours to play a video game. Not to mention the fact that if it was truly supposed to be a bachelor/bachelorette weekend, sorry, but it doesn't matter what ER's brother-in-law prefers to do -- it's supposed to be about K.

Plus, K and I only get to see each other two days a week. It's no big deal for ER and her boyfriend, who work together and practically live together anyway, to miss a Friday night together. K and I have so little, and there's the fact he's about to be deployed. We don't give up those few nights we have very easily.

Last weekend at our OU watch party, ER and a guy she hung out with all through college (I became better friends with their group of friends my junior and senior year) were talking about their two favorite places they couldn't wait to visit in Norman. Those places are OK, but I could go to Norman every weekend for 10 years straight and never visit them, and I wouldn't miss anything. Those bars are all right, but they're not my style. I always liked the ones that more people go to. The bars they like are a bit out of the way, and they're more for a low-key night. I don't like to get trashed and dance on tables or anything, but I like to go to the bars where I'll see people from college -- the sports bars on campus corner with the awesome music.

The fact that ER and her boyfriend decided not to go to the game (partly, I was informed, because of the fact they don't get paid before Florida) meant K and I were less likely to spend time with them. ER decided to have a watch party at her sister's house, and she even started calling it "my watch party," which was fine, but it was one more sign of the evolution of the weekend from a bachelor/bachelorette weekend to a weekend she was planning to fit her preferences, but I felt like she was still calling it mine and K's weekend.

When I found out we had more people coming with us to Norman, I called ER to let her know the weekend probably wasn't going to turn out as planned. I tried to get it across to her as best as I could.

K, his friends and I wound up leaving later than planned for Norman, since we had to pick up another tag-along at the airport. ER and her crew left earlier and went straight to her sister's. I'd wanted to just go the hotel and relax, since we had an 11 a.m. game. I wanted to rest and chill so I'd be ready to go for the game the next day. But as we got closer, it became clear the guys with us -- including K -- were not interested in driving so far to sit in a hotel. Since I love Norman so much, I was down for going out too. I wound up being the designated driver, though, and our group decided to close down the bar. I was exhausted, but I still got up early Saturday for the game.

K and I had a blast at the game. We watched the game with (I did have "sat with," but that's a lie, since there's no sitting in Sooner football!) a college friend of mine and two guy friends I ran into from high school. One of K's best friends just got back from three years of being stationed in Korea. He's a grad student at OU, and he and his wife stood with us too. It was an awesome game, and we killed M!am!. Woohoo!

That night, we all went out to dinner, then had drinks at a friend's before heading to campus corner again. I told ER about our plans, in addition to several other people. ER never called me to tell me whether they were coming. They were all interested in a different restaurant that's too hard to seat such a large group.

We had a great time Saturday night, and I was able to see so many people I rarely get to see outside of Norman. I went to text message ER to tell her we were out, but I realized I'd forgotten my phone at the friend's house where we'd had drinks before going out. I knew she'd be upset, since she'd already called me that night to tell me she felt kicked out of the plans.

It was a good weekend all in all, but K and I always manage to find ourselves spread so thin between everyone we want to see and feel obligated to see. No matter where we are -- OK, Pennsylvania ... sometimes even Dallas and Louisiana. There's never enough time, and we only have two days together at a time as it is.

I talked to ER tonight after the gym, and as expected, she was upset. She wasn't angry, but more hurt than anything. I can understand, but I felt like she was giving me a guilt trip. She told me she was spending $650 on plane tickets to see us get married in Florida, but we couldn't even meet up in Norman. I had apologized to her, but she kept saying more things about it. I know she's upset, but I hate having to apologize for something when I don't feel like it's my fault.

I know I could've done a better job about communicating our plans, but the thing is, we just had way too different groups for things to work out. The people I was there with wanted to party and have a good time (and I was more in that group), and ER and that group wanted to do the more relaxed nights with the Wii and the artsier bars. I feel like Norman is my turf, and it's ER's too, but when I go back, I want to do what I want to do. There were just too many people involved for that to happen and for everyone to be happy.

It was a good weekend, but I'm frustrated about that. I'm going to keep quite on my frustrations unless things with ER don't get better in the next couple days. If she still sounds upset in a couple days, I'm voicing my frustrations. It's only fair.

On a happier, non-venting note, here are some fun pictures:





They always have fun stuff waiting for everyone in the student section.









Danielle and I managed to run into each other inside the stadium!







So the jersey and necklace? Yeah, those made a nice sunburn on the left side of my neck. It'll look awesome in the Florida wedding pictures (hopefully all evidence will be gone by then!).





I miss my old roomies! We always have a blast together!







Our classy room at the Super 8 had one mirrored wall in each room. It was nice -- except the opposite. I definitely thoroughly inspected the sheets before going to sleep here!