There's a sucker born every minute. This one was born almost 27 years ago.

ER's baby shower is this weekend. I'm flying back to Dallas for it. That's costing me almost $250.

I feel bad that I'm not there to help in all this time, so I've offered to do whatever I can from afar. I volunteered to do the invitations. I designed them, and I ordered (and had rush-delivered) 50 pale yellow envelopes so I could get them sent out in plenty of time. I printed them out, wasted a bunch of envelopes, bought postage, and mailed them. All in all, that probably cost me just under $45 (actually, there was an extra $30 if you add in the envelopes I originally ordered that arrived in a shocking shade of highlighter yellow).

So I'm at about $300 (without the oops envelopes). Then you add in the $50 I contributed with two other girls for a stroller or car seat or who knows what.

And there's the $60 I spent entirely on my own at H&M because they have adorable baby clothes that are so cheap it's hard NOT to buy them. That's my own fault, but it adds into the cost. And so does the $7 ridiculously adorable headband I ordered from Etsy.

Seriously, is this not one of the most adorable damn things you've ever seen?!!! I'm not even kidding, I was THISCLOSE to ordering two just to hang onto one for the next 10 years until K and I have kids of our own (please, oh please, let us have a little girl with springy brown curls!).

Now we're talking about the final preparations this weekend. I recommended some games. ER's sister found some game where everyone paints a onesie. I've offered a couple times more to do anything I can to help. ER's sister suggested I go to Wal-Mart to buy plain white onesies. They're $10 for a 5-pack. We need 30.

That means I'll be spending $60 on onesies we'll be virtually destroying.

Which brings my grand total for this shower to $480. Which is effing ridiculous. Especially since it doesn't include the money I won't be making for taking Monday off (without pay, since I haven't accrued a day of vacation yet) when I travel back, since the shower is on Sunday afternoon.

ER's sister has mentioned that I could help on the day of the shower by going to a florist to pick up some flowers she's ordered. I don't know if that means I'll have to pay for those as well.

I know that I chose to fly to the shower. I'm excited about it. I know that I chose to go in on a gift with two other girls. I know I chose to spend $70 on adorable things I found for the baby.

I don't remember if I volunteered to co-host the shower, but as far as I'm concerned, that was never a question. ER is my best friend. She was my maid of honor.

I'm not sure how we'll handle things at the end -- if the four of us hosting (ER's sister, me, ER's friend from San Diego who is NOT flying in for the shower, and a college friend who randomly volunteered to help) will tally up the shower costs and divide them among the four of us, or if everything will go unmentioned and we'll just suck it up individually. I'm definitely too much of a sucker to say anything about it.

I guess it's a good thing I have my own job now. I definitely know where this paycheck is going.