In general, K is light years ahead of other men when it comes to thoughtfulness and consideration. So it shocks me when we have those times that smack me upside the head and remind me that even though he's a really really good one, when it comes down to it, K is still a man.
When I decided on K's gift last October, I was so excited that I told him I had made my decision. I asked if he had thought about what he was getting me. Of course, he hadn't. No big deal; he had time.
Each time there would be a development with K's gift, I'd ask him if he knew yet what my gift would be. Each time, he still didn't know. I had given hints -- peridot jewelry (it's both our birthstones!), a silver necklace (he gave me a gold heart necklace for our first Christmas), a really cute yellow linen cabinet ... K also knows that I've wanted a really nice digital camera for a long time. That would be a huge gift, but it's an idea. I didn't know how K couldn't figure something out.
It was about two weeks before the ceremony when K's answer finally changed. Suddenly, he knew what he was going to get me, so I didn't question him again. He's an awesome gift-giver, so I was excited about what he could have thought of. (The spa gift certificate he gave me the Christmas before he left for Iraq was the best, most thoughtful gift ever. When I opened it up, he said something along the lines of "I won't be here to do it, but I want to make sure you're still pampered.") His gift to me didn't have to be big or extravagant, but I knew it would be something special.
The day before the wedding, I was talking to ER about the jerseys. She asked if I had any idea what K could get me. I told her I had a few: (1) Diamond studs. I wear my $2 fake ones almost every day, so I could see him buying me real ones. (2) The peridot jewelry or silver necklace. (3) The nice digital camera. (4) Or a trip. We hadn't gone on a honeymoon after the Florida wedding (we had half a day to ourselves after the ceremony before we drove back with K's dad & brother). People had been asking us both quite a bit if we were going anywhere for a honeymoon, and we had even talked about a few places -- Hawaii, Costa Rica, Cozumel, Key West -- but we'd made no plans. I could see K having something planned all along.
"Oh my gosh, those are all such awesome gifts! I can't wait to find out what it is!" ER said. I was excited too.
On the day of "I Do, Part 2," as I waited in the church choir room for the ceremony to begin, I handed K's gift and card to my bridesmaids to deliver it to him. (No, I didn't see these pictures until after the wedding.) I anxiously waited for them to come back. I couldn't wait to hear K's reaction.
When the girls got back, they were empty-handed. "He didn't send anything with you?"
"No," they said.
I figured K wanted to give me his gift in person. Or maybe, like if it was the honeymoon thing, he would tell me at the reception. That would be a K thing to do.
But the ceremony came and went, and the reception came and went, and the wedding night came and went, and there was no surprise from K. It had slipped my mind, so I didn't think of it until the next day, when we were talking about the jersey. I gave him a chance to mention it, but he didn't. I said nothing.
Later that afternoon (still the day after the wedding), K and I were headed home from ER's house, where we picked up the gifts and things left from the ceremony. We were talking about the gifts, so I brought it up to K. I mentioned how he had finally said he knew what he was getting me, and I asked when I would get to find out what it was.
K sighed. He took a deep breath and told me that he had forgotten to get me a wedding gift.
Wow. I hadn't expected that, but I didn't really care. "It's no big deal," I said. "It's not like I married you to get a gift."
"I know," he answered, "but how hard would it have been to just have a card? That would have taken five minutes. But I had nothing." He went on. He said he had felt like an a**hole.
As I listened to him, my feelings started to change. "OK, now that I'm thinking about it, I'm starting to get mad. I spent a lot of time working on those jerseys! And for the Florida wedding, I easily put 24 hours into that scrapbook." I explained to him that the Florida wedding was different, since the Dallas ceremony was always going to be the "real" wedding, but still. I put a lot of time and thought into both those, and he couldn't even remember to get me a card.
K said to me, "You're making me feel worse."
I explained to him I wasn't telling him any of this to make him feel better or worse. I just needed him to know how I felt. "Besides, it's not like you forgot to reserve a limo and make dinner reservations for your bachelor party."
I told him that it didn't matter what the gift was, but it was the sentimental value. I love things with sentimental value (who doesn't?). I told K that that was the whole point -- that I could someday say to our kids, "Your dad gave me these earrings on our wedding day," or "K got me this camera as a wedding gift because he knew how much I love photography."
Anyway, on Memorial Day (observed), we were laying around the pool with one of K's friends when something came up that made K tell his friend about his goof-up. K admitted to us that he had ordered his gift for me on the wedding day, while I was getting my hair done. I don't know why he hadn't told me about that the day before, but he explained that he thought it should still count as a wedding gift since he'd ordered it on the day of the wedding.
We'll see. But whatever it is, evidently K got it in the mail on Monday. And finally, tonight -- almost two weeks after the wedding -- I'll get to see what it is.
1 comment:
So what was it?? :)
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