What's funny is I've often been called 'the mom' in my group of friends

I think moms are superheroes. I swear, the things they have to carry (all at the same time!), the things they have to do and think of and prepare for ... They constantly have to have this other tiny person on their mind because that other tiny person is completely dependent upon them.

I could silently observe babies for hours. The things they do, the things they learn ... They really are fascinating. But they terrify me. They somehow make me feel shy and uncomfortable. I wind up asking them stupid questions: "Are you all dressed for Halloween?", "Are you going to read me a book?", "What is that? Is that your toy?" Idiot! It's a baby! You know she can't answer you!

Sometimes a baby will hand me something, which really makes me nervous, especially if there are other people in the room: Great, she just handed me a book. Does she want me to just look at it, or should I read it to her? ... Oh gosh, he's bringing me a cup. Do I say thanks, or do I have to pretend to drink out of it?

I was never really around babies growing up. All my cousins were right around my age. Then, when I was 9 (and too busy playing to care), my uncle and his wife had a baby. He was the only baby I was ever around at all growing up, and I rarely saw him since he lived far away.

Having a child of my own was something I knew would happen sometime in the future, but I never thought much of it until I got Piper. All of a sudden, I had this dependent little puppy to take care of. I wanted people to like her, and I wanted her to constantly behave (did NOT happen when she was a puppy). I worried that I was overdisciplining my dog. In an effort to not become my mother, I was second-guessing everything I did. I wanted my dog to be good, but I didn't want to be too strict on her, either. AND SHE'S JUST A DOG.

It was then that I developed my fear of having a child someday. If I was this bad with a dog, there's no telling how insane I'll make myself with a child.

At 26, I still haven't spent much time around babies, but I'm quite certain that will change. A few of our close friends (including the ones we're staying with this week) are starting families, and a few more are getting to that point pretty quickly. And in two or three years, K and I will be at a logical point in our lives to begin our family. Whether or not we're ready then will be another story, but we'll see.

My fear of babies might have made me abandon the whole idea of even having kids of my own, but I can't spring that on K after we're married. Plus, in spite of my missing mom gene, I'm excited about someday sharing that experience with K. He's great with kids, and it's obvious that he's going to make an amazing father someday (again, in at least three years).

Hopefully spending little bits of time with our friends and their children will make me feel more and more comfortable around kids. And if that hasn't happened before K and I find ourselves with an expanding family, then I guess I'll just be thankful that children don't form long-term memories until after age 3!