We're really gonna do this ... I think

It seems K's coming around to our little family planning ... plan. While we were in PA last weekend, I overheard him telling his brother that we'll probably have a baby in the next year or two, and the next day, I heard him telling his friend's wife (that couple is K's age and has 5 kids!) the same thing.

I've still pretty much kept it a secret. I told you guys, and I finally told ER about it several weeks after I wrote the post. It's come up in conversations with Heather, who reads my blog (actually, who I know from the blog), and with CG, since she reads occasionally also.

But that's it.

My aunt asked me about it over Christmas, and I told her we'll start thinking more seriously in a year or two, but I didn't go into details. I've told people I'm not really repulsed by the idea of having kids soon anymore, which was a big enough development for these people to understand how big of a development it was (my, am I eloquent today!). Part of me doesn't want the barrage of questions to come from my very ready family, and the other part thinks it's fun to have a little secret.

But even though I haven't been talking about it much, I've been thinking more about this whole baby thing. One of my closest friends, Danielle, gave birth to her first baby -- a girl -- last week. Seeing her pictures is exciting, and I feel more ready to be in that phase myself. Not completely ready, but I have a feeling that transition will take place soon after a positive pregnancy test.

K and I have talked more about our plan. I'll finish my last pack of birth control pills in mid-May. We'll resort to other methods at that time, but we know other methods are less effective than the pill, which could mean we get pregnant immediately. (Not that there's any guarantee that won't happen before we stop with the pill.)

Timing-wise, it's kind of go-time. We know we're here in VA for another year, probably leaving sometime after Memorial Day next year (I'll be a few months from 29 by then). After that, we'll likely spend 10 months in our next location while K is in a school (approaching 30 by then). After that? Who knows. But a deployable unit is very likely, which means me ... raising a baby ... by myself ... potentially in a strange place.

This sucks, but it's kind of what we've signed on for. The price you pay for marrying a badass superhero. While I would hate to have K miss any part of our future children's lives, it's part of military life, plain and simple. Not to say that any pregnancy or birth or growing baby is less meaningful than another, but I'd love to have K be here for all of those firsts (especially since I have no clue how my body will react to this business).

We could wait until after a likely deployment, but we'd like to have a baby before I'm 30 (which is 35 for K). And while things are wrapping up in Iraq and Afghanistan, we may find ourselves at war with another country/ies in the next coming years. Or the world could just end in 2012 ... (does anyone else like making the 2012 joke as much as I do?)

So basically -- even without deployments considered -- this is as stable as we'll be for the next 2 years. And even though driving/moving halfway across the country with an infant doesn't sound like the best-case scenario, it definitely sounds better than being pregnant and/or giving birth while moving halfway across the country.

Which brings me to the next item on my mind: space. We live in a 3-bedroom home. We have a nice, spacious guest room, and I intend to keep it that way. Which leaves us with our office. Our tiny little office.

It's dark (partly because of the paint, which I love, and partly because of the size and fact there's no overhead light). It's small. It's funny-shaped -- kind of triangular.

And we'd have nowhere else to put anything in there at this time.

Which means we'd just have to throw in a crib, probably on the half-OU, half-Army wall. At least there's a nice closet in there, which would minimize the need to find room for a dresser or something.

Would we have to repaint? Would it be OK not to? Would we want to? Would it make sense if we're only looking at being there with a baby (potentially, that is) for a couple months?

Is this bad?

So much to think about!