It's all Greek to me (even if it's Italian)

I would love to cook, really. It's just hard, though, since I live by myself. I get home, and I'm starving. The last thing I want to do is spend 45 minutes preparing a meal that will take me 15 minutes to eat. I would rather spend 15 minutes "cooking" something in the microwave, then spend those other 30 minutes watching TV and letting my food settle so I can go to the gym, come home, shower and go to bed.

Excuses? Probably. But I'm okay with that.

A co-worker was just talking to me about how easy it is to cook and how it doesn't really take that long. "Go to FoodNetwork.com," she said. "It's got great recipes that take 30 minutes or less."

So I visit the site, filled with promise and a hope that even I can become a cook before I ever go off and get married and have someone else to cook for.

I click "Quick & Easy" at the top of the page. I click on "One-Pot Meals." Sounds easy. I am directed to a page with videos for three different meals: Giada's Frittata, 30-Minute Chili and Hearty Chicken Stew. Chili is good, but not exactly what I'm looking for right now. Stew? Um, no thanks. We'll try Giada's Frittata. So I click on the recipe to see what exactly is in Giada's Frittata and to try to find out, to begin with, what the heck Frittata is.

The heading over a yummy-looking picture reads "Frittata with Asparagus, Tomato and Fontina." Sounds good; still intrigued. But what the heck is Frittata? By now, I'm guessing some type of pasta.

Then, there's the recipe:
- 6 large eggs (I can do that!)
- 2 tablespoons whipping cream (I've used that before!)
- 1/2 teaspoon salt, plus a pinch (I can totally do a pinch)
- 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper (I'm not sure it's freshly ground, but what's the difference?)
- 1 tablespoon olive oil (I can SO do this recipe!)
- 1 tablespoon butter (Yummy dinner, here I come!)
- 12 ounces asparagus, trimmed, cut into 1/4 to 1/2-inch pieces (Whoa ... getting harder here. I can probably do that. Of course, I'll be really proud of myself after.)
- 1 tomato, seeded, diced (Dang it! Pizza it is ...)
- Salt (Again?! I thought we already did salt! How much am I supposed to add?! Agghhh!)
- 3 ounces Fontina, diced (What the heck is Fontina, and why am I dicing it? How do you "dice" something?)

I decide FoodNetwork.com is not all that helpful for me, but I read the directions, just in case:

Preheat the broiler. (I think that means turn on the stove? I can do that.) Whisk the eggs, cream, 1/2 teaspoon salt, and pepper in a medium bowl to blend. (Eek ... I have a whisk, but that doesn't mean I use it. I thought you only use a whisk to make scrambled eggs.) Set aside.

Heat the oil and butter in a 9 1/2-inch-diameter nonstick ovenproof skillet over medium heat. (Argh! I have a 10-inch skillet, and I hope it's nonstick. But it's not 9 1/2 inches! I think they just have a more-equipped kitchen than I do. I live by myself, people! And why does a skillet need to be ovenproof? It only goes on the stove! Is that a special kind of skillet, or are they all "ovenproof"? But if that's the case, why do they specify? Is it just to make people like me feel inadequate in the kitchen?)

Add the asparagus and saute until crisp-tender, about 2 minutes. (Saute? That sounds hard.) Raise the heat to medium-high. Add the tomato and a pinch of salt and saute 2 minutes longer. Pour the egg mixture over the asparagus mixture and cook for a few minutes until the eggs start to set. Sprinkle with cheese. Reduce heat to medium-low and cook until the frittata is almost set but the top is still runny, about 2 minutes. (Whoa ... asking for a kitchen judgement call from someone who's not in the position to make those.) Place the skillet under the broiler. (What's a broiler?!) Broil until the top is set and golden brown on top, about 5 minutes. Let the frittata stand 2 minutes. Using a rubber spatula, loosen the frittata from skillet and slide the frittata onto a plate.

I'm exhausted already. I definitely think that little "quick & easy" recipe would take me more than 30 minutes. Especially since I still don't even know what the heck Frittata is!